Oh...Never Mind!

And just like that, we're done with the first month of 2015. Boy that went by pretty quickly! With over 31 days under our belt, we've had enough time to form some new habits (it takes 21 days of consistency for a habit to stick). Did you make any resolutions, goals or plans for  how you wanted to shape 2015. How have you been doing so far? How much have you accomplished? Is your goal still on your mind?

I recently read an article that February 2 is the day that those who do, give up on their goals/resolutions/NY changes. I get it. I myself thought as I indulged in ice cream and nutella that clearly is not in my goals, that since the next day is the 1st of February, it would be a good time to get back on the horse and restart my resolve. And then on February 1st found new ways to give myself a break from my goals (it's Sunday, I'm tired, the cookies are right there, it will take forever to cook a real meal, I'm starving! I need a nap, I'll work out later enough to burn ALL the calories I've eaten etc). Then I read the article and realized that I was headed straight to the February 2nd stop. I immediately hopped off that train!

So did you make it past February 2nd? Have you given up on making things right with your family? or giving up coke? or cooking healthier meals? or simply loving yourself more? Are you back in the same place you were last year and maybe the previous years?

In case you're on the February 2nd bandwagon, here are a few tips to get you off and towards things that matter to you!


-Write out what you want to change. Even if you're already done this, it's good to be reminded of what your goals are.

-Recommit to your goals by  listing what it will take to get there. For example, in order for me to work out before work, I must wake up by 5:30am which means I must actually get to bed on time.

-Remember that there's nothing magical about tomorrow, or Mondays or your anniversary to start something. Today's as good a day as any.

-Understand that though you often feel super, you will have challenges and simply have to start over. It's completely ok to stumble when you're working towards a goal; I believe stumbles give our success dimension and a better appreciation for our deserved reward. Even you, as determined as you are, will lose track sometimes. Just get back on it.

-You will not fail. For many of us, our starting point is failure. We look at the past, or other people's experiences and decide that we will never get that thing we really want. But we put on our fake confidence mask and half-heartedly pursue our goals anyway, only to balk when challenges arise. You will not fail; it might take a few attempts, longer than other people and revisions to your strategy, but you will not fail. Keep trying.

-Remember your  motivation. Why is this thing important to you?  Remind yourself of why you want to make this accomplishment and use that to spur you on.

-Be your own cheerleader. I am time-challenged...as in I know the time, but you know, I'll get there. This year, I'm working on becoming more time-conscious. I get scoffed at all the time when I share this goal, not because my support system is mean, but we often just don't see how others will change that thing that seems so ingrained. Whenever I am able to adhere to my schedule, I celebrate myself a little and use that to keep trying.

So let's keep working on making 2015 an amazing year! I would love to hear your thoughts! 

Half-stepping diva

Loving You

Oh lawdie! I don fell off the bandwagon...and it backed up and rolled over me! over and over again! Ok, dramatics, but I did fall off and have lost my consistency in my dietary choices and it shows!

Since I have gotten to a more manageable weight, I decided to keep going and made a goal of discovering/building some ab muscles. You know, I purport to still carrying around some baby fat...no, not from having a baby...from when I was a baby 30 something years ago! And since I have been lackadaisical about my eating habits and my efforts in the gym, my potential for a 6 pack has expanded into the potential for a keg. Ok, still a bit dramatic, but my magic number of 35 inches around my mid section is slowly becoming a thing of the past. And this sister is not happy whatsoever about that!

As a 30 something year old woman I am definitely aware of how my appearance affects my daily interactions. I have used my perception of my body and/ or how it looks in clothes as a block to some things that I have wanted to do. Sometimes while getting ready to go out, I'd get so frustrated with my appearance that I simply would not go. Or decide against making plans in the first place because I didn't want to face the lying 3 way mirror in the dressing room, which has a sole purpose of seeking rolls of fat and putting it on magnified display. Though sometimes trivial, our appearance can be a stumbling block in our confidence and how we portray ourselves. And women are not the only ones who do not always feel confident about our appearance...it's a human thing that also affects our 30 something year old brothers as well...some of them are just better at not caring as much!

So once again, I'm resolving to consistency in my eating. I had cut out all added sugar (blog entry about how I finally lost the weight is coming soon!) but have slowly worked it back in my diet. So, back to what has worked, and focus on sculpting the muscles that I see trying to take shape. But above all those things, I am resolving to love my body no matter what she looks like!

I've recently been reminded of life's realities and with that, the importance of love, starting with love for all of me..including the silver hairs forming at my temples, my "athletic" build, my interestingly shaped toes and all those fat rolls that seem to only appear when I need to feel my best. I must love all of it. We often find faults with our body and harp on it, whether it's the acne that make us look 12 rather than 30 something, the extra body hairs that make us think of our Auntie Sally's mustache, premature graying, skinny legs, baldness, man boobs, a crooked smile or whatever we think should look better in order for us to feel great. But these are all the things that make us who we are and we often do not have control over them - no matter how hard I try, I will not grow past the 5'7" at which I currently stand (in fact, I might shrink as I get older!)

So as I chase the appearance for which I've been working so hard, I will continue to love me and not be so quick to criticize and demean myself. All of me is perfect. Period.

Half-stepping Diva

Halfstepping!

Ooh I've been half stepping! It's been a while since my last entry...lots has been happening and I've actually been dreaming about blogging but it just hasn’t happened. I have been meeting more 30 somethings and it has been reinforced to me over and over again that this is our optimal time for reflection and growth. In the last month, 30 something has also become more of a reality for me...no more 20’s.

Turning 30 hasn't been half as daunting as I thought it would be. Maybe this is because I have been mulling over it for a few years now, or because I've been so excited to get there. Getting to 30 means several things to me.
1. Privilege: The fact that I've gotten here is a privilege; I know too many people who have not made it to this age.
2. Letting go: I can let go of some of those things that happened in the teenage years and move on. The last few years have almost been a consequence of decisions or things that happened in high school and college. A new decade gives me a chance to evaluate my decisions apart from what my world looked like in my 20’s.
3…. and about that career: While I've been ambivalent about my career choice, 30 obliges me to commit and pursue a career with more determination. If I ever felt like I have “more time” to make this decision, well,  time’s up!

Resolve to keep on

So here I am, about 3 months from the end of the year, reassessing my goals for the year. I have met quite a few of them, and others I have actually forgotten were goals. During this past year, I am learning more than ever that every day is a new opportunity to renew my commitment to my goals. I often find myself wanting to give up when I take an extended break from fulfilling my goals. But a break should simply be just that, and not a permanent hiatus.

So the first goal that I am working on is to continue to share my thoughts through this blog. Even though I haven’t published in a while, I have been writing and the plan is to clean them up and get your thoughts about them. In preparation for getting this started, I realized I should probably set some guidelines for myself. I haven’t quite decided if I want to use this forum as a series of very public journal entries, to provide random thoughts, share my experiences and expertise or just a collection of sarcastic quips with the sole purpose to entertain or maybe even offend. Being a person that needs some level of structure, I’ve decided to define the purpose of the blog a little bit more, knowing that this will and should change as I get more comfortable and actually start thinking of myself as a blogger (I’m not quite there yet). In the meantime, I have lots of interests that I would like to share with readers out there.
Health corner: In order for our success, we must be healthy. Public health is very important for me and as we navigate the 30’s, our health will become increasingly relevant.
A weighted battle: Though part of our health, weight issues have a special place in my world. I have been “battling” my weight and surrounding health implications for a few years now and it turns out everyone is having this battle. I would like to share some thoughts, tips and other information to help us keep our weight in a healthy range.
Women matters: I am very concerned about the plight of women in the world. It is very apparent that we live in a man’s world and I would like to add my voice to the many voices out there about how much women do matter in the world. I am also interested in getting women to feel comfortable about ourselves and would like to discuss some of the more intimate life situations that we don’t always get to discuss or hear other folks discuss (Sorry, nothing kinky). Men, don’t check out of these discussions!
And the rest: I have interests in the world, the arts, cooking, relationships, my hair issues, and much more than I hope will stimulate discussion and definitely let us realize that we’re all experiencing different shades of the same life challenges.

 Thanks for coming along this journey with me. The goal is to get out an entry more often than not (finding it hard to commit, but certainly not every 6 months!) and I hope you find relevance in them. I welcome comments, suggestions, thoughts and even jokes! If you haven't already, remember to subscribe and confirm your subscriptions so that you have receive the updates right in your inbox!

Best regards
Half-stepping diva