How to get back on the horse

For the last few, ahem, months, I’ve thought almost daily about my blog. I’ve started quite a few blog posts – in my head, of course, but often found the usual blog chattering had been replaced with silence. 

As the months rolled together, I’ve thought about how to get back into it – I started a new site which would feature my new brand and a new concept; I redefined my blogging space several times. I then decided that in order to prevent another writing hiatus, I had to have at least four blog posts ready to be published. But what actually happened? I didn’t ever finish the new website, abandoning it at the first sight of an obstacle; my redefinition fell flat, and well, I don’t have the four posts ready to go.

This week, a friend unexpectedly asked me about my blog; and I had to resist my usual defensiveness and just reveal that well I’ve fallen off the horse and stayed fallen. I promised him that I’ll have a blog published by the end of the week.

Once I fell out of habit, I decided that my "comeback" needed bells and whistles; it had to be “extra special” to excuse my inaction. When we trip and stray, we create multiple roadblocks that keep us further from our goals and justify our inability, insecurity, lack of commitment, shifted priorities etc or whatever it was that tripped us up.  

So what are the steps involved in getting back on the horse?

Step 1: Get back on the horse

Step 2: Gallop and keep going

I've been reminded that the best thing we can do for ourselves is literally to just do it; there's no need to find a new horse, or adorn the old, find a new stepping stool, or as my pastor said today, pray about it.

So here I go, getting back on this horse; writing and sharing me. Thank you for your support!

Still halfstepping!

Half-stepping Diva

Oh...Never Mind!

And just like that, we're done with the first month of 2015. Boy that went by pretty quickly! With over 31 days under our belt, we've had enough time to form some new habits (it takes 21 days of consistency for a habit to stick). Did you make any resolutions, goals or plans for  how you wanted to shape 2015. How have you been doing so far? How much have you accomplished? Is your goal still on your mind?

I recently read an article that February 2 is the day that those who do, give up on their goals/resolutions/NY changes. I get it. I myself thought as I indulged in ice cream and nutella that clearly is not in my goals, that since the next day is the 1st of February, it would be a good time to get back on the horse and restart my resolve. And then on February 1st found new ways to give myself a break from my goals (it's Sunday, I'm tired, the cookies are right there, it will take forever to cook a real meal, I'm starving! I need a nap, I'll work out later enough to burn ALL the calories I've eaten etc). Then I read the article and realized that I was headed straight to the February 2nd stop. I immediately hopped off that train!

So did you make it past February 2nd? Have you given up on making things right with your family? or giving up coke? or cooking healthier meals? or simply loving yourself more? Are you back in the same place you were last year and maybe the previous years?

In case you're on the February 2nd bandwagon, here are a few tips to get you off and towards things that matter to you!


-Write out what you want to change. Even if you're already done this, it's good to be reminded of what your goals are.

-Recommit to your goals by  listing what it will take to get there. For example, in order for me to work out before work, I must wake up by 5:30am which means I must actually get to bed on time.

-Remember that there's nothing magical about tomorrow, or Mondays or your anniversary to start something. Today's as good a day as any.

-Understand that though you often feel super, you will have challenges and simply have to start over. It's completely ok to stumble when you're working towards a goal; I believe stumbles give our success dimension and a better appreciation for our deserved reward. Even you, as determined as you are, will lose track sometimes. Just get back on it.

-You will not fail. For many of us, our starting point is failure. We look at the past, or other people's experiences and decide that we will never get that thing we really want. But we put on our fake confidence mask and half-heartedly pursue our goals anyway, only to balk when challenges arise. You will not fail; it might take a few attempts, longer than other people and revisions to your strategy, but you will not fail. Keep trying.

-Remember your  motivation. Why is this thing important to you?  Remind yourself of why you want to make this accomplishment and use that to spur you on.

-Be your own cheerleader. I am time-challenged...as in I know the time, but you know, I'll get there. This year, I'm working on becoming more time-conscious. I get scoffed at all the time when I share this goal, not because my support system is mean, but we often just don't see how others will change that thing that seems so ingrained. Whenever I am able to adhere to my schedule, I celebrate myself a little and use that to keep trying.

So let's keep working on making 2015 an amazing year! I would love to hear your thoughts! 

Half-stepping diva

A sugar-free challenge



"I will NEVER eat chocolate again! OMG! What? Why? And who made that decision?! Seriously? Are you mad?!" -This is what was floating through my mind when I determined that a sugar-free lifestyle was more suitable for me.

The thought of never eating another piece of chocolate completely overwhelmed me, stressed me out and well, as you can imagine, I ended the day indulging in at least a bag of chocolate. Take that, sugarless lifestyle! 

It has definitely been a challenge working sugar out of my system and a bigger challenge convincing myself to sustain it. The forever aspect of it still overwhelms me...so you mean I will not eat cake at my wedding? (Oooh the brain travels far and fast, eh?) And how does it work with my family? Will others understand this lifestyle that I clearly do not understand myself? Will they support me? Will they sabotage and give me sugar whenever they can? Can I really stick to this? Do I want to do this? Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Ok, let's pause and get a hold of ourselves a bit. A sugar-free lifestyle is not much of a stretch for me, I mean I'm already vegetarian and have a highly restricted palate. In fact, my mom’s desire for me as a child was to live life without added sugar. She specifically fed me all the fruits and veggies she could so that I would develop a taste for them. When we moved in with my grandmother, she was instructed not to give me any candy as grandparents usually do, and as grandparents usually do, she went firmly against it and voila! the sweet tooth monster was unleashed! My mother herself at some point gave up sugar. For all my childhood, I never saw her eat candy or any of the delicious cake with lots of icing that she made. She didn't even add sugar to the foods that usually called for sugar. So why can't I imagine doing the same in my life?

Well, sugar has become such an integral part of our palate. Think of what you have eaten so far today or recently? How many of the foods contained sugar? Eating sugar really has become such a no-brainer for all of us. From breakfast to dinner, we have several opportunities to load up on it and we usually don't let the opportunity pass by. Even those who do not have much "taste for sugar" (what does that even mean?!) and prefer savory/salty foods still consume sugar in large quantities.

Since I've been working on this new lifestyle, there have been many opportunites to try again. I

usually set time periods for my goal that allowed me to focus and stay disciplined. After the time period, I would "briefly" pause to savor some of the foods that I had been avoiding. This would usually stretch out into a few days (or weeks!) after which I would recommit myself to my cause. At some point, I decided I had been off sugar enough not to crave it and could just have "a little here and there"...alas, no. Soon as I worked in back in my diet it was like we had never been separated! Come to mama!

So now what? I am currently working on a body sculpting goal that requires the utmost discipline, which means, no added sugar until the goal is met (however long I decide to stretch out getting there!) There will be some birthday celebrations in between, and I plan on celebrating however it comes - I won't go out of my way to pursue sugar. For other times, I will politely decline and if necessary explain.

And for the rest of my life?! Well it's still an overwhelming thought. Some of my favorite foods require, yes, require sugar. I bake quite often and though I can sweeten my pastries with fruit, sometimes a girl needs cookies that taste like cookies! And my chocolate -well, dark chocolate is very good for your heart. In fact, 1.6 oz/daily has been shown to improve heart health (but who can eat only 1.6 oz!) Everything in moderation, right? The bottom line, good health!

I am more aware of my triggers to binge (stress, boredom, emotions, just because, self-sabotage/ reward for doing well) and I will continue to avoid having chocolate at home. I know sugar is not THE enemy and avoiding it is only one part of the solution to good health, so I will not villainize or obsess about it.

I challenge you to work sugar completely out of your diet or at least reduce it. Can you imagine your world without sugar? Can you go a week, 3 weeks, forever without it? Do you already lead a sugarfree lifestyle -how do you do it?


P.S. In case you missed it, I discussed my love of sugar and our break-up in this post, and why we had to break up here.

Sweetly yours
Half-stepping diva

Still sugar loving

I'm sitting here enjoying my pudding...no worries, since I was reminded of my goals in life, I have definitely been really off the added sugar, though the last 2 remaining cones look so lonely in the freezer! Anyways, earlier in this post, I talked about my love for sugar and adopting a sugar-free lifestyle. So let's talk about how it worked out for me.

1. I started by assessing how much added sugar I eat.
In the U.S. sugar is added to the oddest foods. I had to stop using a particular seasoned salt because the second ingredient was sugar. It turned out many other foods I ate were chock full of sugar; many of the low fat options which have been touted as more diet-friendly and healthier have been loaded with sugar to make them more....well palatable.
I started reading about the different names of sugar, which include: anhydrous dextrose, brown sugar, cane crystals, cane sugar, corn sweetener, corn syrup, corn syrup solids, crystal dextrose, evaporated cane juice, fructose sweetener, fruit juice concentrates, high-fructose corn syrup, honey, liquid fructose, malt syrup, maple syrup, molasses, pancake syrup, raw sugar, syrup, white sugar, carbitol, concentrated fruit juice, corn sweetener, diglycerides, disaccharides, evaporated cane juice, erythritol, Florida crystals, fructooligosaccharides, galactose, glucitol, glucoamine, hexitol, inversol, isomalt, maltodextrin, malted barley, malts, mannitol, nectars, pentose, raisin syrup, ribose rice syrup, rice malt, rice syrup solids, sorbitol, sorghum, sucanat, xylitol and zylose.

So how much sugar is in it
1 teaspoon of granulated sugar = 4 grams. So if my food contains 8 grams of sugar, I'm consuming about 2 teaspoons. In some foods such as fruit, naturally high in sugar, this number can look alarming: a serving of my daily banana contains 17g of sugar; about 4 teaspoons of sugar. As these sugars are naturally occurring, I did not eliminate them from my diet; my focus was on added sugar. An easy example of added sugar is a can of soda which contains 39 g of sugar; almost 10 tsp of sugar.

And how much added sugar should you eat?
Well, the new WHO guidelines recommend less than 5% of your daily caloric intake should come from added sugar. For most folks this will be around 25 g or 6 teaspoons of sugar.

I was eating more added than any of the recommended guidelines, even the previous ones of less than 10% of my daily caloric intake.

2. I found alternatives to some of my favorite foods that contain a lot of sugar.
I switched the seasoned salt, spaghetti sauce, and other foods that really didn't need sugar, like my honey covered peanuts. I love pancakes but between the sugar in the batter and the syrup was consuming almost 50g of sugar if I used 1/4 cup of syrup. So now I don't eat  pancakes as often, and when I do blend bananas into the batter and top it with fruit (berries etc).


3. I eliminated slowly.
The most obvious source of sugar for me is chocolate. I simply gave it up, there was no way to gradually taper that off. For other sugar sources, I started by using less. For example, I enjoy a nice cup of chai tea w a good serving of sugar and milk. I started by reducing the amount of sugar until I was down to a half-teaspoon.

4. I discovered new ways to eat my food. 
My breakfast consisted of high fiber cereal, most of which contains added sugar. I switched to oats which I did not sweeten and opted instead to top it with raisins and walnuts. I learned to love green tea, once I learned how to brew it and completely eliminated adding sugar to it. And though I don't drink it as often, drink my chai tea plain. I also diversified my palate and started adding more protein to my breakfast.

4. I avoided processed foods.
Cooking helps determine exactly what goes into the food and generally eliminates a lot of sugar. We trust the food industry a little too much with our health. Back to basics. My cooking has gotten more creative. The pudding I'm eating is sweetened with a few dates. The other ingredients are pure cocoa powder (the bitter antioxidant containing stuff), milk (cow or nonsweetened soy) and tofu (I know I lost you on that one!).

5. I gained an understanding of why excess sugar is bad for me.
My family has a history of diabetes and a slew of other chronic diseases. My dentist, well, she's probably amassed a small fortune from my dental bills. This year's checkup revealed my health indicator numbers are looking good and have definitely improved over the last year. With this in mind, I have become more determined that this is the lifestyle that fits my goals.

6. I set a specific time to adapt my new lifestyle.
The fast was for 3 weeks. I determined that during that time I would be super disciplined. I also realized 3 weeks was enough for it to become a habit. After the 3 weeks, I extended it and have continued since with mini pauses when life moments have happened or when fear has set it.

Of course it has not been all flowers and roses and cake...ooh cake with icing and ice cream and...! There have been many challenges and many opportunities to try again. Overall it's been a great success and I'm excited for my new lifestyle habits. I'll discuss the challenges in my next blog entry. In the meantime...

Stay sweet (without added sugar of course)

Half-stepping diva

My Sugar love

One of the ladies in my class hadn’t seen me in a bit, and asked yesterday if I was off sugar again. I had to admit to her that yes I was generally off sugar except for the half tub of ice-cream I had over the weekend along with the little cones that I demolished the day before and on my way to class. Why do you ask, I say… She says she could see it….and I was looking good! Oh right! My efforts do show, even when I don’t see it! I guess I’m back off sugar.

 

Saying I have a sweet tooth is an understatement. I truly believe that whatever sensor in our brain that tells it to shut off eating sugar, because our blood glucose has risen too fast, often takes a nap -and for long periods. My shut-off mechanism kicks in only because we have made it to the bottom of the bag and there’s no more. I often tell folks I eat chocolate by the bar or box or whatever container it comes in. As a child, my mother would bring home treats for the whole family…I would eat mine and everyone else’s. There was no stopping. I got sick right after my birthday EVERY YEAR…I would indulge in my birthday cake which my mother lovingly adorned with Smarties (like M&M’s but wayyyyyyyyy better, I have some at home if you would like to try it!) along with all the other sugary foods allowed.  As an adult it got worse because I could simply purchase as much as I wanted. Indeed I regularly keep a few pounds of chocolate at home. I love traveling to new places, usually because I can sample their chocolate. I can’t admit how much I spent on chocolate last year in London…even I was horrified when the lady told me my total….say what?

And I’m not the only one in my family.  My family’s request when I travel…chocolate. Years ago, my brother won a 5 pound Hershey bar…it didn’t take long for me, my father and him to blow through it. Though, my father was recently amazed at how much chocolate I quickly ingested…I guess I take the cake for the sweet tooth of the family….oooh cake! Yum! Ok, ok, I’m back.

So imagine my surprise when for 2014 I successfully gave up added sugar, which of course includes my beloved chocolate! In the past, I have gone for months banning chocolate from touching my lips. This usually happened after an especially punishing binge (2/3 bags or bars in a sitting) after which I talked myself into giving up the chocolate. At the beginning of the year we have a corporate fast at church; I usually do a full Daniel’s fast and eliminate sugar etc (Daniel’s fast eliminates meat among other foods, which I already do, so my focus is on the other parts of the fast). So I’ve done that successfully for a few years now, and had drastically cut down my sugar intake in the process. But in 2014 I decided to make it a lifestyle change and removed added sugar from my diet.

I’ll admit, this was not easy at all. I mean, at all. Sugar cravings will make you forget everything including the fact that you're avoiding sugar! But the reward has been amazing. The first thing I noticed was that contrary to what I thought, my energy levels stayed the same and possibly higher. I am high strung and overly energetic which I had attributed to my sugar intake, but alas, it's all natural baby.  I also noticed that I was not overeating as much. My stop eating mechanism seemed to be functioning a lot more and quicker. And of course my favorite change was my weight adjustment. The scale went below 150 lbs, something I'd been struggling to accomplish - and my midsection got trimmer. I noticed my skin was smoother, probably from losing the fatty tissue accustomed to sitting right underneath it. And the ladies in my class noticed...only after about a week!

So why is sugar the bad guy.
Well this article explains that eating too much added sugar increases the risk of dying with heart disease (even if you're not overweight).

CNN reports here that excessive added sugar consumption can cause fat buildup in the liver which can attribute to obesity, Type II diabetes and cardiovascular disease

And this article from SFGate discusses similar trends including an impaired immune system which prevents your body from fighting viruses, bacteria and other guys bad for our health.

Oh yeah and it contributes to dementia and aging too!

I started the elimination as a part of a 3 week commitment and decided to extend it out. This allowed me to be really focused and work at keeping my commitment. There have certainly been slip ups and oopsies, but my newly adopted lifestyle has shown me that even I, the queen of the sugar world, can put my mind to something and accomplish it. I'll talk more about how I stayed on track and the challenges of a sugar-free world in the next blog entries! Stay tuned.  

Happy living!
 
Half-stepping diva

 

What is you waiting for?

It doesn't take very long for 30 something year olds to realize that life is whatever we make of it. We actually have to get up and do something if we want it. It often starts after school when we learn that we have to actually apply for a job, attend interviews and hopefully get employed. If we want a spouse, we have to go out there and meet someone (if we haven't already), court and then work our way towards marriage. There is no longer a wait and it'll happen...whatever we want, we must pursue.

Most of us understand this concept in its broad sense. I mean, there are very few people at this stage of life waiting for someone to offer them a job just because their name is John or Mary, but somehow we find a way to wait for life to happen in other aspects of our world.

How often we do hear, I am waiting until X happens before I do Y. One of the most common ones that I hear involves weight loss. Many 30 something year olds would like to accomplish something that requires physical and mental dedication....so once they lose the extra pounds, they will train for a 5K. Or some of us afraid to work out in public and prefer to wait until we've lost the weight before joining a gym. In some cases, we are in pursuit of spirituality and religious knowledge, but want to wait until we have our minds right before pursuing a religious affiliation. My favorite of all times come from our 30 something year old brothers who want to "get their lives together" before pursuing a relationship or before taking the next step in a relationship. What are we really waiting for?

Life waits for no one. Many of us have attended enough funerals or heard about the passing of very young people to realize that there is no time to wait. Whether it's a new career, a chance at romance or pursuing our dreams, there is no time to wait. My mother always reminded  me not to put off to tomorrow what I can do today. And I think of that daily.

I often find myself in a place of comfort, not wanting to leave the perceived stability of my current, in  pursuit of what could be, or not be. And thereby miss out on a chance for something to change. Many 30 something year olds find ourselves stuck in a rut because we are waiting; for something to happen, for something to change or get better. Meanwhile, the hours are passing into days and soon enough years.

Do not wait for your skin to clear up before becoming more comfortable with your beautiful face. Do not wait to lose weight before pursuing anything, be it a date, clothes, love, job interviews etc. Do not wait for circumstances to be perfect before you take a chance at love. Do not wait for someone else to see the world, to go to the gym, to try that new restaurant, to see a play, to lose weight etc. Do not wait for a specific day/holiday before you do what you like. Do not wait for your bank account to reach a certain number to pursue what you really want to do. Do not wait to be less busy to spend time with people, or do things you've always wanted to do. Do not wait for the right circumstances to go back to school or pursue your career. Do not wait for the best circumstances to have children. Do not wait for a partner to be all that you can be.  And do not wait for the "right" time to tell those you love how you feel...the time may never come.

The Dreadmill

In my Getting Started  post, I talked about being on the treadmill and how I started slowly and then built it up and was finally able to run for 5 miles. What a successful story of triumph over the treadmill and the gym....And flowers and rainbows and unicorns and yeaaaa, if only it were that simple.

Oh the treadmill, how I love/detest thee! I decided to use the treadmill as my starting point at the gym. It was an old and familiar friend that had gotten me to my weight loss goals in the past so it was easy to hop on and run walk.

At the beginning, I didn't think it would be very difficult. Though I wasn't in shape, it was something that I had done before. How out of shape could I really be?! Well I soon found out that I couldn't pass a high school PE class! Initially, this didn't bother me very  much, until I spotted all the forty, fifty, sixty and seventy year olds going at a faster pace. Goodness gracious, how embarrassing!

I started paying attention to my fellow competitors, I mean gym members. There was a huge variety of them and many like myself, favored the treadmill. I observed that some of them would cover the display screen with a magazine or towel, some would read the entire time (how could they do that and run?!), others would get on the treadmill and simply run, while others came with their gym buddies and spent  more time talking than walking. One guy in particular would come in, hop on the treadmill and run at a dizzying speed for about 30 to 45 min and then leave. Oh how I wanted to have that talent!

It's a Mental Thang
Armed with my observations, I put together my own version of my treadmill experience. I would usually start with a 2 minute walk to warm up. The first few minutes of running after that were the most difficult. If I could get my mind to push through, it was easy enough to complete the workout. I also started to understand why folks covered the display screen. I would be huffing and puffing on the treadmill, having beaten the first few minutes and convinced myself to stay on, only to look down and find out that I had only be on there for a total of 6 minutes and still had about 24 whole long minutes to go! My feet would feel like bricks and I would instantly feel completely tired!

Running on a motorized platform that was not going anywhere soon got old and required major mental muscle to stay on. I found distractions that kept me running. I had noticed a sign that was posted in front of my machine of choice (yes by this time I had a specific machine that I preferred and would wander around the gym until it became available).  The sign was simple enough: it alerted gym members that there was  time limit for treadmill use and referred members to a wait list at the front desk if all treadmills were in use. I noticed that the second treadmill in the sign had 3 L's instead of 2 and this became my focus to get through my runs. I would start running and immediately want to quit and look at the sign, chuckle a bit to myself and then stare it down for the remainder of the time, willing the 3rd L to disappear.


When this technique would not work, I would stare out the window in front of me and count the number of cars that went by. Or if there were children playing basketball, I would keep score for them or cheer for them as they developed their skills on the court. I also learned to trick my brain by convincing myself that once I had completed 50% or 60% or 75% of the workout, I could walk. Once I got to the agreed upon point, I would talk myself into finishing it. 

Once I became comfortable with the treadmill, I started competitive running. Well, ok, I competed with whomever was on the treadmill to them, unknown to them of course. I would slyly glance over to see their speed and at least match it, often times cranking mine up towards the end to beat them. That attempt to keep up would spur me on and I would often hit faster speeds than I intended just so that I can "beat" them!


Endurance
As I kept challenging my heart on the treadmill, I started noticing that it would take me a bit longer to get it racing. I also noticed that I didn't wear out as quickly doing other exercises.

 

HIIT

Since then I've learned how to be more efficient on the treadmill. I added a burst at the end of each run to challenge my heart: I started around 7.0 mph and have gone up to 9.5 mph. I also use the High Intensity Interval Training technique to burn maximum fat in the shortest period of time.  I start with a 2-3 minute warm up (walk), followed by 2 minutes at 6.7 mph, 40 sec at 7.5 mph and 20 sec at 9.0 mph and then 2 min rest at 3.0-4.0 mph and then repeat it. I do about 3-5 sets of this for a total of 15-25 minutes. This technique can be done at any level; the key is to find a goal speed and work towards it.   

 

Though I found the treadmill to be a dread, it became the starting point for my come back into fitness. With the newfound endurance I'm able to push myself in all my workouts. The weight loss I experienced as a result of the treadmill helped build my confidence to keep working on my fitness and weight loss goals.

 

Lessons learned

1. Just run: whether it's on the treadmill or out in the open, just run (jog) or walk if that's what works

2. It takes a time and consistent effort to build endurance. Lack of consistency will require restarting each time. 

3. Like anything in life, if you believe it, you can make great friends with the treadmill

4. Distracting yourself on the treadmill can allow you to push through an especially tough workout

5. A little friendly competition is good for your heart

6. HIIT is an efficient way to maximize your workout, it can be done on the treadmill or really with any cardio workout.

7. The treadmill is a good starting point, as well as a great part of a workout at any level.

 

Did you see what this guy does on the treadmill?! Anything to keep you going!

 

 

Half-stepping diva