Desserts spelled backwards

So in the last few weeks, let's see what's been going on in my world. Weird sleep schedule (sleep late, oversleep, sleepy in the middle of the day) check; mindless activities - watching movies all day, constantly playing with my hair check; mindless eating usually prefaced by a little (ok big!) chocolate binge check, starting things, but never finishing check; feeling overwhelmed check; feeling unmotivated check; Fatigue check; Restlessness check; suddenly needing to do all the mundane tasks I've put off check (well, half check because I start and realize I have no interest). Uh-oh I think I am stressed out!

With deadlines approaching, projects looming, endless checklists, pending exams/tests, addition of new family members, planning weddings, planning anything and wanting to get this and that done, we're bound to feel stressed out from time to time. Some of us are in a perpetual state of stress and don't really know life any other way. We're often caught in the middle of work expectations, deadlines, family expectations and many things that just keep us in a constant state of ON. Our ability to deal with our stress goes a long way to a healthy heart and certainly a healthy life.

OM-Times Magazine

Stress is inevitable, and although we experience it at different levels, we’re all bound to feel the tightness in our chest and the complete loss of control at some point.  So since I have finally stilled the noises in my head (at least for now), I thought it would be appropriate to discuss some of the things I should have done and some of the things I’ve been doing to get me through this itty bitty stressful time.

Recognize stress: My brain/body likes to keep me protected and does not tell me I’m experiencing stress. I often realize it when my sleep pattern changes or I notice that I’m reaching for sugary foods in great amounts. I’ve realized that I generally suppress stress and I’m about a week into it before I realize what’s going on. Dealing with stress well means recognizing the signs of stress. Think about it, what are some of the things you do when you're stressed out? 

Food: I’ve gone through a shameful amount of chocolate in the last two weeks and barely remember eating any of it. Many of us are comforted by food while stressed out. For some sugar provides that comfort, for others, salt. Either group is not particularly good for our bodies and certainly not for the stress. This CNN article describes the best foods to eat when we are experiencing stress and includes: blueberries, seeds (pumpkin, flax, sunflower etc), cashews, turkey, spinach, milk, pistachios, oatmeal, salmon, avocado, yogurt and dark chocolate (one square). Hmmm no ice cream in sight!

Physical activity: While many of us want to just sit and maybe sleep and hope the stressor will just go away, it is actually very healthy to move when we are experiencing stress. With blood pumping throughout our bodies, shuttling away cortisol and distributing the surge of many feel good hormones, movement is a great way to de-stress. This includes walking, running, dancing, sex, lifting weights, boxing, etc.  
Life's best medicine: Laughter definitely gets me through stressful times. It can be difficult to see humor in anything when we are stressed out, but laughter can sometimes be the thing that gets us over the hump. Watching something funny can be a great stress relief, or better yet calling up that loved one that you know will have you in stitches in no time!

Life's other medicine: There's something about music that is just so soothing to the stressed soul. When stress sets in, I turn off my TV and upsetting news, and plug into some soulful, joyful and uplifting music.

Mindfulness & Deep breathing: When I'm stressed out, I tend to engage in a lot of mindlessness. It's like my brain wants to shut down completely so as not to deal with the stress and apparently anything else. But becoming focused is a great way to deal with stress. It causes us to really look at what our stressor is and figure out what to do to overcome it. It is also good to take in deep breaths, which forces an increased amount of oxygen into our lungs and helps slow down our heartbeat and causes us to relax. Yoga is a fabulous activity to accomplish both of these as the practice requires mindfulness and focus on breathing.

Socialize: No, this doesn’t mean you should stay up chatting with friends instead of studying for that big exam! But it helps when we “vent” or talk about the thing that is causing us stress. Many of us find ourselves in isolation during stressful moments, partly because we are cranky, but often because we just can’t be bothered. However, in stressful situations, it can be useful to have discussions with like-minded people that can help sort through your head and help explore solutions, if that’s what’s required. Of course, it’s prudent to pick people that will not exacerbate your stress by unloading on you!

Writing: I often write out my thoughts to help still the discontented, disjointed, dis-everything thoughts that come up when I’m stressed out. I find the very act of writing things out shows me plainly what I need to do. A clear mind is definitely a great way to better decisions.

There are many other things to do to relieve stress. Sometimes it’s a matter of getting some fresh air and a new perspective. Sometimes it takes cleaning up our space so that we can see things clearly. Other times we just need to reset and take a quick break from the madness of our world. I often find that prayer also helps!

So how do you de-stress? Let me know!

Smiling
Half-stepping diva

Energy conservation

Last night after my Zumba class, someone who had never taken my class stayed after to give me some feedback. He told me that I was not swiveling my hips enough when I danced the merengue, and not standing straight enough during my samba. As he said it, I didn't have the correct form for the various latin dances. As he is classically trained he recognized what good form is in latin dance. He took about 10 minutes to explain his concern that I was misleading my students. Even though I wanted to explain to him that Zumba Fitness is not a dance class, I listened and thanked him for his feedback. This interaction was quite upsetting to me.

I decided not to let it throw off my confidence and not to worry much about it. Of course this didn't quite work. I take pride in what I do, so the idea that I was misleading my students was very unsettling. After thinking through it some more, I realized that I was obsessing.  It's okay for him to voice his concerns, though unfounded, but there's no reason to take it on.

Our words are often like arrows and can have lasting effects on others. I remember many hurtful things that have been said to me that I've held onto for years. The few times I've confronted the person, they barely remember uttering them. It's like when someone cuts you off on the road and you get upset. You might try to "show" them by riding close to them or by even gesturing obscenities. Oftentimes they are lost in their own world, oblivious to your ire. A friend once told me "you can not control other's actions,but you can control your own reactions".

I have been doing pretty well not thinking about my interaction with the student. Whenever I would think about it, I would remind myself of what I else could be using that energy for. It is very easy to give credence to people and things that are not very important to us. Those people or things in turn suck the energy right out of us.

I am fairly conscious about the environment and energy conservation. I do my best to turn off lights, be mindful of how much water I use and I even recycle paper, bottles and plastic...all in attempts to conserve some energy. In that same way, I must conserve my own energy. It takes so much of it to think through a problem, think about someone who is not even concerned with me, or just plain stress out about a situation. In as much as life requires our attention, our attention is often a wasted effort. Most of us have higher heights that we are trying to attain but instead find ourselves expending precious energy on trivial matters that will never take us to those heights. In setting our eyes on the prize, we must also refrain from being pulled down by those energy zappers that are there only to wreck havoc.

So I choose not to obsess about this criticism I received. Instead, I've decided to use it as an inspiration to remind us that words do hurt, another's perception does not have to ever become our reality and above all, we must put our optimal energy towards things that will elevate us, our life and that of the people around us.

Half-stepping diva